Families are essential in helping their Child to relate to People
What is a family (for)?
* what are its members, roles, functions?
* differences in environment, cultural
background, religion
* early relationships with parents create
the blue-print inside child's mind that
is applied to all others
What is the role of a parent/ mother/ father?
* physical care, emotional and spiritual
nurturing, guidance, teaching
Vital functions of a parent are to help their child to:
* use his mind for thinking, imagination and symbolising
* regulate him/ herself + manage his/her ‘bad’, painful, scary (anger, frustration, loss,
sadness) and overwhelming feelings of excitement and 'too much'-ness
* generate love
* uphold hope: for development in the future, and not to succumb to depression
Parents: Regulators or Dysregulators?
* Is the parent a regulator or dysregulator? or Do you feel better or worse when with
mum/ dad? (mutually dysregulating hyperarousal)
* Emotional regulation: amplification of positive affect/ feelings and moderation of
negative affect/ feelings
* Every interaction forms new neuronal pathways in the brain (interactive regulation).
* Auto-regulation will always fail, because it produces insecure attachment and can lead
to total cutting off, withdrawal and autism
What do children need?
Interactive Regulation:
* ‘Listen to what your child is telling you and say it back to them in words.’
(in their behaviour and about how they are feeling/ thinking)
* If only 1 ‘Praise’ per 6 ‘Negatives’ Þ psychological damage (Sue Jenner)
‘Praises’: ‘attends’, asking to play, gentle touching, praising, smiling, imitation,
ignoring naughtiness, tracking child’s attention
‘Negatives’: commands, teaching, criticism, ‘no!’, negative touch/ face, double-speak
How do you help your child to manage/ regulate his/her bad feelings?
* What helps you when you are feeling bad?
* How can you help your child to moderate his/her bad feelings
Email: info@reachingautism.org
What is a family (for)?
* what are its members, roles, functions?
* differences in environment, cultural
background, religion
* early relationships with parents create
the blue-print inside child's mind that
is applied to all others
What is the role of a parent/ mother/ father?
* physical care, emotional and spiritual
nurturing, guidance, teaching
Vital functions of a parent are to help their child to:
* use his mind for thinking, imagination and symbolising
* regulate him/ herself + manage his/her ‘bad’, painful, scary (anger, frustration, loss,
sadness) and overwhelming feelings of excitement and 'too much'-ness
* generate love
* uphold hope: for development in the future, and not to succumb to depression
Parents: Regulators or Dysregulators?
* Is the parent a regulator or dysregulator? or Do you feel better or worse when with
mum/ dad? (mutually dysregulating hyperarousal)
* Emotional regulation: amplification of positive affect/ feelings and moderation of
negative affect/ feelings
* Every interaction forms new neuronal pathways in the brain (interactive regulation).
* Auto-regulation will always fail, because it produces insecure attachment and can lead
to total cutting off, withdrawal and autism
What do children need?
Interactive Regulation:
* ‘Listen to what your child is telling you and say it back to them in words.’
(in their behaviour and about how they are feeling/ thinking)
* If only 1 ‘Praise’ per 6 ‘Negatives’ Þ psychological damage (Sue Jenner)
‘Praises’: ‘attends’, asking to play, gentle touching, praising, smiling, imitation,
ignoring naughtiness, tracking child’s attention
‘Negatives’: commands, teaching, criticism, ‘no!’, negative touch/ face, double-speak
How do you help your child to manage/ regulate his/her bad feelings?
* What helps you when you are feeling bad?
* How can you help your child to moderate his/her bad feelings
Email: info@reachingautism.org
